Tuesday, December 10, 2013

REVERB 13 Day 10 Auto Pilot



Early this morning in my outdoor studio 12/10/'13



"Life on auto-pilot can feel disorienting and dull. How did you cultivate a life worth loving during 2013? How can you turn off your auto-pilot button in 2014?..".


Those are two tough questions to explore for today's Reverb 13....

My whole life I have been trying to 'please' some one other then myself. I think it started when I was a child...being a middle child in a family of 4 was not fun for me. I had an older sister, a brother and a younger sister. In my extended family of cousins my older sister, along with being the first grandchild was prettier and smarter and had more talent. Of my other siblings my brother was the only boy and my baby sister was the cute baby of my family. That left me with being not quite 'anyone special'. 
I'm sure I have exaggerated memories of how "mistreated" I was but I can certainly relate to being a "typical middle child. Never having a little niche of my own. Only with my oldest uncle Jack did I feel special. I think he knew! Because of this back ground of feelings I have always tried extra hard to please and to fit in. Which leads me to now.
I think the most important thing I did to create a life worth loving this past year is to learn what is good for me and what isn't. To not just 'go along' even though I would rather not. To do more of what makes "me" happy by dropping some old relationships keeping the good ones and fostering new ones with like minded souls.
How am I going to turn off my auto-pilot button in 2014?

I will in the coming year, and forever after work hard to stay on this path of positivity (is that a word). When considering something, be it an activity or a group or a person, I will not fall back into the 'auto-pilot' thing of just saying yes but will first think about the outcome and how it will affect me and those I care most about. Will it be a good thing or am I again just following the old path of least resistance. Following the old habits. I can do this by implementing all I have learned from my life's experiences.

Because of this change I have made in my life I will end the next year with better mental, emotional and physical health and will be a better person for it. I will love the life I am living



6 comments:

  1. Yeah for finding out what you love and going after it Darlene! I too am a recovering people pleaser and have discovered how important it is that I am authentic with myself about what I like and don't like :)

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    1. We are kindred spirits...you and I...Thank you for being in my life Christine. Between you and Ruth my life is so much better then it was a year ago.

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    2. This comment makes my heart smile Darlene & I wanted to say how much I LOVE your outdoor studio!!!! I have always wanted to work with gourds - did you grow them too?

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  2. That's such an important realisation to come to. As another recovering "people pleaser", I know that putting ourselves first is not as easy as it sounds. xx

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  3. Darlene! Life is such an awesome journey! I keep growing and making progress toward becoming the person that I long to be...releasing the past and thinking I'm the person people told me I was. I AM CREATING MY OWN WORLD with wonderful people like you in it. I see you as so special!!! Hurray for Darlene!

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    1. Isn't it wonderful when we are able to create our own world to suit us...I agree that getting rid of old baggage is a good thing and allows us to move forward in such positive way...and to travel it with people we who ar special to us. Yea for us intrepid travelers of the creative world!

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